6 Easy Ways To Tell If You’ve Got Depression Or Anxiety

Anxiety Or Depression: Which One Do You Have?

When it comes to telling the difference between depression and anxiety, no wonder it can get confusing: many people with anxiety tend to get depressed, and many people with depression can feel anxious!

Baffling, isn’t it? But here’s what’s even more baffling to me…

Depression and anxiety share things in common, like “negative” thinking, which makes it hard to tell them apart when you’ve also got to deal with them as your real life problems.

But the two are different… and the differences may surprise you. I’ve got 6 to share with you from the perspective of cognitive therapy. And if you’d like professional and compassionate help with your anxiety symptoms, I encourage you to read this.

Knowing the differences between depression and anxiety is never more relevant than when it comes to telling them apart inside yourself. In that spirit, here are 6 simple ways for distinguishing between anxiety and depression to help clarify your experience of life right now.

What Are 6 Differences Between Anxiety And Depression?

#1. Negative Appraisals

Whether you’re depressed or anxious… your appraisal of things is negative.

If you’re depressed, your negative appraisal tends to be universal. You probably see what’s wrong with everything and you’re convinced there are no alternatives.

But if you’re anxious, your negative appraisal tends to be specific. You probably see some wrong aspects and you’re much more open to considering possibilities.

#2. Negative Futures

Want to know what really concerns both depressed and anxious people? The future.

If you’re someone with anxiety, you probably see a future that’s a mixture of anxiety and hope. You’re not ready to give up, at least not if you can do something about it.

But if you’re someone with depression, you’re probably looking for help on how to build a better future. You understand that starts by focusing on how to manage your daily struggle.

#3. Failures Or Mistakes

Failing is one of the best ways to tell the difference between anxiety and depression that’s sure to be easy and clear when it comes to your own experience.

If you’re a person with anxiety, you don’t believe your failures or mistakes are final. But if you’re a person with depression, you probably believe your mistakes can’t be taken back.

#4. Negative Evaluations

You always hear about “being open to what life has to offer.” And if you’ve got depression or anxiety, chances are you’re not the most open and receptive to new experiences.

With anxiety, you might feel unsettled about new experiences, but your opinion is also unconfirmed. Whereas with depression, you’re likely to feel certain that time will prove your negative thinking right.

Now let me throw in an additional detail. I believe there’s a subtle distinction that accounts for the difference in the level of certainty…

Depression focuses on loss. Anxiety focuses on threat. So when it comes to evaluating new experiences, you can see how depression and anxiety would do so differently.

#5. Anticipation Or Regret

Anxiety usually fears what hasn’t happened yet… while depression is likely about the pain that happens after.

If you’re anxious, you probably anticipate possible threats and attacks. But if you’re depressed, you probably regret significant losses and relationships.

#6. Motivation

This one may be the most notable difference between anxiety and depression, and here’s why: It’s all about where you are right now in terms of your energy levels.

If you’re someone with depression, you’re probably exhausted. And if you’re someone with anxiety, you probably only occasionally struggle with feeling stuck or frozen.

So which do you do? I offer both therapy for anxiety and therapy for depression. I know getting this part of your life handled as soon as possible is important to you, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

You can reach out to me here:

CONTACT ME

Find out more about Depression Treatment or Anxiety Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment and anxiety treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

If you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

How To Cope With Zoom Anxiety

Emotional Risk And Fear About Video Calls

Do you ever get anxious about joining a video call? Maybe you get “too invested” and the internet feels more important than the real world?

When you talk to people online, it’s easy to feel emotional risk. You’re sitting in front of the camera and the technology blocks out all other distractions. You might go into “stage fright.”

For a lot of people, talking online can cause chest tightness anxiety or even shortness of breath anxiety. When they talk to other people online, they can feel a real fear of loss. Good thing if you’re ready to work with an anxiety therapist, you can truly change the way you experience challenges like this.

Anxiety Can Give You Fear Of Loss

Maybe you feel more anxious the closer you get to starting the call, which could make you nervous about messing up. You might even worry if you mess up you’re going to lose out on something important.

But pause and reflect. Is that really true? And let’s ask this in the form of a classic question from cognitive therapy…

Where’s Your Evidence?

In other words: How can you prove that, if you make a mistake on Zoom, you will face negative consequences?

Most of the time when people interact online and someone makes a mistake, it’s really no big loss. Most people aren’t going to make a big deal about it. However, it could be that person believes it’s a big loss because they also feel emotionally vulnerable and at risk.

So what’s the evidence against this idea there’s something to lose? Have you overlooked any evidence you might have a successful Zoom experience? Cognitive therapy recommends we look for “evidence” to back up our logic because if it doesn’t make sense upon closer look, it’s best to let go and focus on moving forward.

If a person thinks talking to someone online is going to provoke anxiety, could this make them feel anxious? What you’ll find is, for most people, your feelings validate your thoughts and together they build on each other. And that is why an anxious person will take negative thoughts to mean there’s got to be something to fear. Fortunately, anxiety therapy can help an anxious person learn the potential for happiness that exists when you know how to manage anxiety symptoms. And also:

Remember that a possibility is not a probability.

Just because you might have a bad Zoom call doesn’t necessarily mean you will. The next call might be a gain, not a loss. And the same is true about any other experience!

Your feelings are valid, which is exactly why it’s to your advantage to back up and support the feelings that are most important to you. If you focus on this in anxiety therapy, you’ll process how you experience life differently and you’ll start to heal. If you’d like to get started on this with me, please reach out.

CONTACT ME

Find out more about Anxiety Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment and anxiety treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

Before I go, if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

What Are The Major Types Of Anxiety?

5 Major Types Of Anxiety  

Let me ask you something: What’s your personal experience with anxiety?

Because psychologists have identified 5 major types of anxiety that someone can experience.

(I think it’s a solid list, but it leaves off some very real experiences people can have like: health anxiety, prenatal/postpartum anxiety, anxiety from medications, or anxiety from everyday life. It’s important these experiences are recognized.)

As you read about these 5 major types, please imagine each one as an area of experience where psychologists noticed a lot of people collect and share similar problems, like social anxiety.

Oh and by the way, I wrote about each one of the 5 major types from its own point of view, because I figure I don’t need to list all the symptoms you can find on Google.

Now let’s take a quick look at each of the 5 major types of anxiety…

Top 5 Types Of Anxiety

#1: Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Maybe you constantly worry something bad is going to happen and you just won’t know what to do. Perhaps you’re convinced if you try to say or do something, you’ll just mess up. You most likely feel this way all the time. If you want help with anxiety you feel most days, please reach out to an anxiety therapist as soon as you can.

#2: Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Maybe you can’t control certain thoughts that are powerful enough to drive you… or stop you. It could be you want nothing more than to control them. You might believe you could control them if you only followed certain rules or methods. You probably go back and think over every detail, and maybe you say to yourself: “I could control this…” If you’re someone who’s looking for help with experiences like this, please think about getting therapy for anxiety.

#3: Panic Disorder

Do you fear the worst because you can’t stand not knowing what to expect? Do you have panic attacks because you fear something very specific? If you’re someone who can get panic attacks with physical symptoms like shortness of breath, dizziness, or chest tightness, then please consider reaching out to an anxiety therapist soon so you can get to what’s beneath the panic.

#4: Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Maybe you can’t forget a trauma you’ve been through. It could be for at least some part of your life you’ve carried around anxiety from something that happened in your past. Luckily, if you’re ready to work with a trained professional on anxiety treatment, you can get the help you need to move forward into future situations.

#5: Social Anxiety Disorder

You might care a lot about what others think about you. Maybe you don’t want to upset them or maybe you really want them to like you. Fortunately, you can work with an anxiety therapist on how to overcome the fear of rejection and other challenges about connecting with people.

Therapy Offers Help And Compassion To All Types Of Anxiety

If we discussed the anxiety you’re experiencing, whether it’s one of these 5 major types or some other type of anxiety… would you feel like you made a successful first step towards getting your anxiety symptoms handled?

Please don’t hesitate to contact me for anxiety treatment right now.

CONTACT ME

Find out more about Anxiety Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment and anxiety treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

(NOTE: because I’m a LPCC, I can’t diagnose your disorder to insurance companies until I’m a fully licensed LPC.)

As I go, if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

How To Manage Your Social Anxiety At Work

Learn How To Manage Social Anxiety In Professional Settings

When it comes to your job, how easy is it for you to “get through” the workday? Have you ever gone in late, left early, or called off because you just couldn’t be there?

Perhaps when you’re there “on the clock,” you can overthink what you’re going to say or do, who’s involved, or how you’ll get things done. Why do these work concerns happen? What is it about these intense minutes on the job that challenge many people with anxiety?

Let me mention this first…

If you ever feel nervous about your job, you probably already want help with your anxiety symptoms. Fortunately, if you’re ready to take action about what’s happening, then an anxiety therapist can help you.

Long-term, you may want to consider preparation… and prevention. You can figure out both long-term strategies in anxiety therapy.

Here are a few mindsets you might have at the root of anxiety about work…

If you’re someone who can struggle with anxiety when it comes to work, here are a few ways you might be thinking about the situation that aren’t helping you move forward…

1. You might think you’ve got no other job options.

You might show up to work thinking there’s just this one job you can do. Or maybe you feel like you wouldn’t be able to successfully replace this job. If so, it’s no wonder you might get very nervous, and find yourself having high anxiety symptoms.

If someone thinks they’ve only got one option, then it makes the only one they’ve got seem very precious. That person might think things like if they make a mistake, it’s all over. And then that person might feel things like shortness of breath anxiety.

2. Maybe you overvalue this job.

You might think your job is in a class of its own and no other job compares. If so, then it makes sense why you might place a lot of value on it. But if you’re also having challenges working there, then you might consider whether or not you’re putting too much pressure on things to measure up.

3. You might think you need to impress people at your job.

This gets at a deeper issue. Many people are unaware of how much they want to impress other people. But have you ever thought about how it really affects someone when they’re trying hard to impress others?

If a person obsesses over impressing others, hoping to get over social anxiety symptoms that way… they might end up doing what gets them the opposite result. Thankfully, therapy gives you the safe space and support needed to truly understand what’s going on underneath your anxiety about work.

4. Perhaps you’re attached to high expectations.

Maybe you’ve built up huge expectations in your mind about something, and you got attached to them. Or it could be you found yourself gripping real tight to what you’d now like help learning how to let go.

In the middle of all this, someone experiencing anxiety may also be enduring additional problems in life. Anxiety treatment offers you healing and comfort during the cycle of worry and any experience that calls for support.

In the meantime, what are some things you can try if you feel anxiety about work? I’ll answer by responding to each one of the items we talked about above:

1. Take comfort from other job options.

Maybe you can’t make any big changes right now and you might feel like this job is all you’ve got even if it can be disappointing. One thing you could try is to look up at least one other job you could do. Ideally, more if you can.

That way, when you’re experiencing your work challenges, you might have an extra boost of confidence because you’ll know maybe there’s another job. This kind of reassurance might be soothing just when you need it, so maybe you can come up with more ways of “finding other options.” You’re reminding yourself how strong you are.

2. Understand this job is probably not permanent.

Most people work at jobs that aren’t where they work permanently for all time. So it’s likely you’ll be moving on to another job at some point anyway… which hopefully takes some pressure off however this job’s going right now.

Maybe it’ll comfort you to know it’s rare that someone’s working a job that’s their permanent position… so perhaps this current job situation doesn’t need to look or feel so permanent. And what ends up lasting instead could be your recovery from anxiety!

3. Instead of the help you can get, see what help you can give.

If someone has anxiety about how work issues impact them and cause them anxiety… they can try helping someone else. Maybe if you ever feel anxious, you could give something to someone else right there in that moment, too. I’ve found helping someone else is a great way to get rid of any anxiety I start feeling. And you might find that if you focus on giving, you’ll start to calm down.

4. Discovering your intention can be healing.

Maybe you’ve had certain work experiences and now you’re wondering what you want to do. Perhaps you need to make an honest assessment of your reasons for being there. You may need to get clear on your intention now. You can use the help of an anxiety therapist to make sure your professional experience gets your needs met without the undue pressure of high expectations.

I find when you get very clear about your intention and act from there, you’ll be able to adjust your expectations as you move forward. You’ll also be able to keep moving forward in spite of any setbacks you might encounter. Or, hey, it could be you want to totally change your intention, so maybe you’ve got an exciting new time of growth in front of you.

Whatever it may be, I can make all sorts of suggestions about how you might adapt to circumstances going forward, but that’s really all I can do on this end without working on this with you in anxiety therapy. If you’d like to get a better handle on how to manage your anxiety, I invite you to contact me for a free 15-minute consultation.

CONTACT ME

Find out more about Anxiety Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment and anxiety treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

Final word: if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

3 Easy, Effective Steps To Ground Your Anxiety Attacks

A Powerful Strategy To Ground Your Anxiety Attack…

When it comes to “grounding” anxiety attacks, what many people think they want and what actually helps them can sometimes be two completely different things. In this article, I’ll share 3 easy and effective steps you can take to ground and stabilize yourself.

Maybe you find it hard to ground yourself during an anxiety attack, and you’re looking for how you can stop struggling? If so, read this!

Because here’s the thing: ask most people what they want during an anxiety attack and they’ll put “instant relief” at the top of the list.

But here’s the catch… you probably know deep down that “instant relief” is a fleeting experience, at best, when it comes to living with anxiety and worry. At worst, “instant relief” can multiply anxiety and worry. And this happens often.

You don’t have to do psychological research to figure out why…

Sure, “instant relief” might work to get an anxious person calm in the moment… maybe even keep things calm for the short-term. But the research doesn’t lie: over time, anxiety remedies based on short-term solutions fail. This is why you put your energy into long-term goals of health and healing so you can truly change how you’re living.

How To Reduce Anxiety Long-Term

So what can you do to “ground” yourself during an anxiety attack—and do it for the long-term?

Here are 3 easy steps to ground your high anxiety symptoms:

(By the way, these 3 steps are commonly known as the “333 rule” for anxiety)

STEP #1: SEE.

Look. Literally, just look around you.

When someone is taken over by the signs of anxiety attack, it’s a natural response for them to obsess about “instant relief.” However, that natural response can become an obstacle to long-term, lasting recovery.

Your chance to rise above the moment—and cope with anxiety over the long-term—is actually when you’re able to see a bigger picture. When you’re doing everything you can to soothe your fears and address your worries in ways you maybe can’t see “right away.”

In more immediate terms, you need to look around and name 3 objects in your environment. This is your “instant relief”… the relief of what’s familiar to you. Then focus on all the details of your 3 objects if you ever start feeling those signs of anxiety attack. Focusing can be a great way to switch your brain off the anxiety track once you recognize those signs but before it goes full attack.

Which brings us to:

STEP #2: HEAR.

This one’s as simple as the first. After you try grounding your anxiety visually, next you can listen to what you hear. So keep an ear open… take in the sounds… and name 3 of them.

After you do that, guess what… these sounds might give you a sense of place or where you are, and that can provide “instant relief.” Familiarity is comforting and can be found in what you hear. So go into the details.

People with anxiety need to choose which way they’re going to listen to the world, positive or negative, and commit to it. Fortunately, working with an anxiety therapist can help turn this into long-term growth. Because unless people with anxiety learn how to listen differently, they’re unlikely to find life-changing, long-term grounding of anxiety happens on its own.

If you want some extra help figuring out what you’re hearing from the world, here’s a tip: I offer anxiety therapy and together, we can work on managing anxiety symptoms… the mindsets you need to cope with anxiety before, during, and after it happens… and how to develop these mindsets into long-term skills and qualities in yourself… safely and always at your pace.

The reality of the situation is you probably need to figure these things out for yourself… my 12 sessions of anxiety therapy can help you and I hope you work it all out for yourself somehow. If you’re interested in working with me, you can find out more details about the 12 sessions here.

STEP #3: TOUCH.

You probably know many anxiety attacks include feeling a loss of control. And you can get a sense of control back as your “instant relief” when you pick 3 parts of your body to move… like folding your fingers together, wiggling your toes, or nodding your head up and down.

(Personal note: sometimes I like to rearrange the physical locations of 3 objects as a way of showing my mind I’m in control.)

In other words, if someone senses bad things coming, they can take back a sense of control by making 3 simple, physical movements that have a genuine sense of confidence… a level of mastery… and an ability to be repeated over and over… built in every time.

When it comes to grounding anxiety, first you need to see the world as it is so you can envision the world as you want it. Only then can you listen for the details as you remind yourself of the very real control you still have.

If not, then sure, a short-term, “quick fix” solution may stop the anxiety attacks for a round or two. But long-term peace will be hard to keep… unless you learn how to ground your anxiety symptoms without looking for “instant relief” or “quick fix” solutions.

Parting Words:

It’s taken me a long time to learn all this stuff (by the way, I’m still learning)… and I hope these 3 steps help you if you ever feel an anxiety attack coming on.

(If you’re interested in doing more research for yourself: you can look into what some people call the “54321 rule” for anxiety, which adds more to the “333 rule.”)

But there’s one more thing I want to say…

Once you do ground your anxiety… you need to know how to stay grounded. Yes, you could just ground yourself over and over each time… but you don’t need to if you “get” it.

And to help you “get” how to manage your anxiety symptoms for the long-term, I recommend you do anxiety therapy with me. Please reach out for a free 15-minute consultation.

CONTACT ME

Find out more about Anxiety Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment and anxiety treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

Final word: if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

How To Overcome Signs Of A Panic Attack

How You Can Get Help If You Experience Panic Attacks 

If you’re someone with anxiety and you ever see those signs you’re about to panic, then you’re probably experiencing the #1 reason why you’d benefit from therapy for anxiety…

Fear.

It could be fear of failure. Or fear about what’s coming. Maybe it’s fear of what a person will do or not do. Or fear about what others think.

And I’ve got a list of 200 more possibilities. Over time, fear can build up into anxiety. This begs the question: what is fear? Why’s it so powerful? And what can you do to overcome it?

(Quick side note: if you’re really looking for help on the deeper reasons behind your anxiety symptoms like panic attacks, then you need deep healing.) I recommend you strongly consider the information I share here too.

Getting back to what I was saying…

First let’s talk about what fear is… then we’ll talk about some ways to get past it. A long time ago, I learned a great definition of FEAR:

False Evidence Appearing Real

What this highlights is the fact that most threats we’re scared of don’t usually happen or come true. Usually, it turns out they’re not real threats like we feared. More often than not, it turns out to be “false evidence.”

I once learned here that 91% of the things we fear and worry about never come true. When I reflect about it, I find this is true for myself and I think most people would agree with the research.

Fear is an emotion. It’s a tool… because in some situations you can use it to save your life. Thousands of years ago, when we ran away from big hungry predators, we needed strong motivators like fear to keep us alive.

When you get a burst of fear, you’ll feel some strange changes happen in your body. And if a person gets scared enough times, their brain gets switched onto “fear mode” and their hardwiring gets stuck. When that happens, their mind is so powerful all they need to do is imagine people or situations and they can get scared of the mental pictures. If what I’m saying makes sense, then you probably also know this can be triggered and difficult to turn off.

At this point you’re probably trying to find help with your anxiety. Fortunately, if you work with a compassionate anxiety therapist, you can rewire your brain and take control of your life back.

Anxiety Therapy Can Help You Move Forward With Hope

The best way to get started is to chart out how to get beyond your challenge in small, incremental steps that build up as far as you want to go. Then, with the guidance and help of a professional, you can make your journey safely there.

If someone slowly and gently approaches what they fear by breaking it up into little chunks… and they see nothing bad happens after the first few steps… then it’s only a matter of time and practice for that person to overcome any blocks because their brain gets reprogrammed and no longer feels fear as a response.

You and I can work on this in therapy through the following ways:

1.     Understand what you believe about vulnerability

2.     Find and treat your “primary appraisal” of threat

3.     Deprogram your “secondary appraisal” and reprogram a new one

4.     Prepare and rehearse how you’re going to respond in the future

… and more.

If you’d like to try anxiety treatment with me, please reach out for a free 15-minute consultation.

CONTACT ME

Find out more about Anxiety Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment and anxiety treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

One last thing: if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

Can Your View Of The Future Make You Depressed?

Looking To The Future When You’re Depressed

Do you have trouble finding hope and optimism about the future?

When you think about your future, what does it look like? I want you to take a minute and really focus on it…

Maybe you find it hard to see yourself living a future full of good times. Perhaps you’re like many others and you see things staying “exactly the same.”

And, even worse…

You might think little about the future because you really don’t want to fail… and you might be worried if you try you’ll fail , so it’s safer not to try.

At this point, you’re probably confused because you don’t know what kind of action you can take to have a different future.

Sound about right? I went a little deep, I know. But hey, here’s a point of encouragement, and maybe a way for you to offer compassion to yourself…

I’m also 100% sure I can use proven therapeutic strategies and techniques to help you replace this view of the future with comfort and healing. And then—hopefully—a different picture of a different future will start to appear.

(Notice I said “different,” not perfect.)

Let Me Help You See A Different Future

How can I be so sure? One reason is because that’s been my personal experience.

But an even bigger reason is… I’m sure because it’s how I helped many clients find it in therapy for depression, too!

I helped them when they faced the consequences of a future of loneliness that depressed (and shut down) any forward progress. I helped them when they faced the picture of a future consisting of nothing but many more “horrible” days.

Best of all…

I helped them replace this fear of the future with something else entirely…

… something that gets away from the past and focuses on your abilities in the present…

Something cognitive therapy calls responsibility for the future. Note: this isn’t saying anyone’s being irresponsible. This is about ownership.

When someone takes ownership of their thoughts, choices, and actions, it leads to healing changes with depression every time. And once they claim responsibility for the future, the threat of a “hopeless future” starts to fade.

Here Are 2 Ways To Claim Responsibility For The Future

Maybe you’re all too aware that you might have more lows in the future, so here’s what I want to share with you…

It’s a scientifically proven fact:

Any person can treat thoughts and feelings about a hopeless future in cognitive therapy and use this to help manage depression…

… and it just takes 2 simple steps:

Step #1:

You need to examine how your views about the future relate to your views about yourself. For example, views like, “Things are probably going to be way worse in the future” have a huge influence over how you view yourself.

Step #2:

You need to work on reorganizing your views about the future instead of letting it happen again the way it did yesterday. I’ve seen reorganizing lead to a lot of helpful insights.

Sound too easy? Many scientists have proven cognitive therapy is one of the best ways to help depression. And it’s one of the best ways I know of for depression treatment.

When you choose to get your depression treated, and then you work with a depression therapist on how you look at your future… your whole depression can start to shift.

A big part of this is learning how to claim ownership and responsibility for the future and for creating the future... which involves the past. When we work in therapy together, I won’t guilt you for any bad choices you made. Too many depressed people blame themselves for the actions of others and I’m not going to do that to you.

Instead, I’ll help you deprogram the parts of the past that hurt you in the present… that way, you might be able to move forward from the past. Then I’ll keep you focused on the growth you make in life.

I know, I know… You might not see any choices right now. It could be you’re struggling hard to see any future. I understand, I’m just saying therapy can help.

It can help you unravel the journey you’ve been on up to now, and then as we face where you are today…

… the way forward into the future might become clear.

If you’d like depression treatment, please reach out to me for a free 15-minute consultation. I hope in the future you can look back on this experience and see how strong and resilient you can be.

CONTACT ME

Find out more about Depression Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

Last thing: if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

Changing Your Self-Concept To Manage Your Depression

How To Manage Your Depression By Changing Your Self-Concept

Let me ask you something: Do you think your “Self-Concept” is important when it comes to managing depression?

What would you rate it on a scale of 1 to 10? Would you give it a 9… or more like a 3?

Does it make that much of a difference in the grand scheme of things?

Personally, I think your Self-Concept is an important key when it comes to managing depression…

Why? Because if someone walks around with the idea in their head that they’re a “depressed person,” then it’s going to be very hard to stop feeling like everything is overwhelming… even if they use some kind of “quick fix” to feel better in the short-term.

Why’s that?

Your Self-Concept Is Key To Your Experience Of Life

Well, maybe you’ve heard about people who only seem to get romantically involved with partners who hurt them…

And this may not happen just once or twice… but over and over.

Maybe you heard this and thought something like: “Really?… How do they keep ending up with someone who messes everything up like that.?”

I admit I was also confused the first few times I heard stories like this. But then I talked to some people who experienced or studied the topic… and I read books about it.

I came to find out this happens to a lot more people than you might guess. I even learned most people with this problem are trying to get their emotional needs met as adults that they never got met during childhood.

What’s happening here? My answer is that a lot of this is explained by self-concept.

Deep inside their minds, these people have a sense of identity that says they’re a person who gets abandoned… who’s unwanted… who receives anger (or neglect) from significant others. That identity is older and has deeper roots than their current reality… the reality of trying to make an adult romantic relationship work. 

So they only get into relationships with others who fit this picture. Their self-concept is so true to them that they find it in the real world.

And another thing: most people who get into these kinds of romantic relationships never experienced safety, acceptance, or connection before… so they have no idea what to do with it when they come across it.

Put differently, they never learned how to recognize, attract, or value a healthy relationship… So they make all kinds of mistakes when they’re honestly trying to do what’s right. It makes me sad to see.

So what’s this got to do with managing your depression? Everything.

This Is Actually Your Best Secret Weapon For Managing Depression…

All you have to do is put some time into developing your self-concept.

I mention my plan for 12 sessions of depression treatment to you a few times on my website. Here’s a few more things I’d like to share that I don’t think I mentioned anywhere else…

The first thing I want to tell you is I’ve taken a lot of inspiration from what a man named Epictetus said a long time ago: “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”

I specifically designed the 12 sessions to address how we react to problems we’re facing. One of the things we’ll work on is how to change your self-concept… by working with you on how you react once you do face challenges in your life. One example is “negative thinking.”

If someone finds themselves thinking negatively, like about why things aren’t working or why they can’t help but fall apart, then they need to go inside and do something about it now. It’s not helping.

Depression Therapy Can Heal Your Self-Concept

If you’re someone who needs therapy for depression, then looking into your self-concept is key. It branches out and connects to many other parts of how you’re experiencing life.

Did I mention that this look at your self-concept is just one of many things we’ll work on? Because it is. Self-concept is a piece of the total 12 sessions—because putting all of them together is the real “secret key.”

A major focus of our 12 sessions is on helping you get an in-depth understanding of the self-concept that a person with depression typically brings to therapy. When you understand why and how you feel something, you’ll know exactly what you need to do to react to that feeling in a later situation.

For example, many people with depression believe the future is bleak. Psychologists say this view of the future feels “hopeless.”

In our sessions, I’ll work to understand what future you see for yourself and if there’s anything you’d like to experience differently, plus manage the relationship this has to your self-concept. The way you view how your life is going to turn out is directly related to the way you view yourself.

If you’d like to work with me on therapy for depression, please reach out!

 CONTACT ME

 Find out more about Depression Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

Lastly, if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

4 Subtle Symptoms Of Depression

4 Signs You’re Depressed… Do You *Know* If You Are?

If you’re like a lot of people who struggle with depression, it feels impossible to explain.

You might think because no one’s ever had your exact experience, that means you’re alone. Or since no one can be inside your head to fully understand what’s going on, maybe you feel different from everyone else.

Here’s my big question…

When it comes to the worst pain many people face in life—the abyss of depression—why do so many of us approach the struggle without the right support and hoping for change to happen on its own?

Why do we seem to avoid asking ourselves the question:

“Am I depressed and can I do something about it?”

Does it ever seem like you’re beyond help (even though you feel like you’re carrying a 100 pound weight)?

You might feel like there’s nothing you can do but feel lonely. It could require too much energy to fight it all the time. Maybe there’s even a little comfort in being sad although it’s not enjoyable.

Before you can recover from and then manage depression, everything—from what you think about yourself, to how you feel about things like failure, to how you communicate—needs to be mapped out and strategized for.

That starts with understanding how depression blocks you specifically, and it can continue in depression treatment. Because as long as your specific experience of depression that’s unique to you isn’t mapped out and strategized for, it needs to be described… even talked through… before you can actually move toward changes in your mood or less depressive thoughts, even if it’s only temporary.

First, here’s an official take from psychologists about what depression is, with all its clinical criteria:

(Signs and Symptoms of Depression).

And second, like I said… I know you might feel like no one understands your depression and it’s impossible to explain it to someone if they’ve never personally experienced it. So here are 4 signs you can look for in yourself before facing another day wondering about depression on your own…

Sign #1: Your Self-Concept Is Negative

No matter what your history with depression is, I don’t need to be psychic to know you’ve taken some real damage before… and that this damage still affects you today.

Maybe it’s the way you look at the world. Perhaps you’ve got negative ideas or beliefs about yourself. Whatever it is, life took a wrong turn, and now you see things differently and sometimes you struggle.

It could seem like things that happen today confirm or support these ideas… which makes it more likely for your disappointment and hurt to keep coming back again. You might feel like it’s guaranteed that challenges and problems will come up out of nowhere… and maybe you’re worried about failing.

But if you’re ready to explore how to repair this situation now, then you’re ready for depression treatment. You’ll heal by finding a new, fresh way to look at your distressing experience, from limiting beliefs to the things that trigger you.

If you’ve ever been curious about therapy for depression, then take a minute and reflect. You’ll need to get a handle on this stuff before you can move away from depression.

Sign #2: You Only See Negative Information

It can happen once, twice, even several times per day, but it’s part of the overall cycle… the thought eventually comes up, even if just for a second…

“When will things get better?”

In fact, you’re probably sure things keep getting worse.

So be ready for this. Have the expectation these things are probably coming, and be prepared. Have a plan to deal with the strong sense of loss that can come over you at any time… or with those problems in the outside world that overwhelm you.

I understand you must have valid reasons for why you feel the way you do… otherwise, you wouldn’t be in this situation.

But it’s also possible you come down on yourself from the perspective of your depression. You might feel wrong when you feel good, for example. Or you might be convinced you’ll ruin anything you try.

If you work on depression counseling with me, you’ll learn how bad situations and depression can aggravate each other for you. Then, if they become a problem in the present, you’ll know what to do to cope.

Sign #3: You Blame Yourself For Not Getting Things Done

I know it’s hard to move forward when forward seems worse than now. That’s why, especially when it comes to activities you could do easily before, you need to give yourself enough compassion to stay “present” while you do them.

Or if you need to do things to pass the time because otherwise you feel anxious you might not be able to avoid how you’re feeling and thinking, then you might be ready for depression treatment.

You can work in depression therapy on how to break apart what you need to do into small steps. Maybe you can figure out how to take one problem at a time instead of trying to tackle everything at once. That way, you’ll have a better shot at avoiding the vicious cycle and you’ll be more likely to function effectively when you need to do so.

Which brings me to one of the most typical signs you’re ready for depression therapy…

Sign #4: Your Depressed Thoughts Are Automatic

It could be you were fine only 2 hours ago but then you have a troubling thought about the future… and you get overwhelmed. Or maybe you have a negative social interaction with someone… and you instantly feel something is wrong.

It’s like a reflex… if something bad happens, you’re likely to need help…

Even worse, maybe when you try to face the experience, your feelings are likely to “snowball”… it just keeps going and going without you being able to stop it.

If you’re someone who really wants to switch your brain off from overthinking and beating yourself up, then you might be ready for depression therapy.

Perhaps you think things like, “It’s my fault when bad things happen.” Maybe next time you can try taking a deep breath, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with the thought. Then see if you can figure out what the deeper feeling or thought is without becoming more upset, frustrated, or shut down… which only distracts you more. What’s underneath that?

Maybe you’ll realize you think bad things are your fault because, for example, underneath that you believe if you’re “nice” or “smart” or “good enough,” you’ll avoid bad things happening.

Then, with the guidance of depression therapy, you’ll keep getting better at figuring these things out… until one day you’ll find yourself learning how to manage your depression.

That’s why I recommend you contact me for a free 15-minute consultation… because depression counseling is the best way to make sure you’re treating your experience with depression, all served to you in a step-by-step, easy format.

Give it a try—at no risk to you—by reaching out to me. Please don’t suffer in silence.

 CONTACT ME

 Find out more about Depression Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

One last thing: if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

How Your Childhood Issues Can Cause Depression… And What To Do

Learn How Childhood Depression May Affect You As An Adult

Think about if you’ve ever encountered someone who said or did something that “triggered” you… switching on that negative wiring in your head... .

Maybe someone said some nasty words, and you still can’t forget it. Or perhaps you put a lot of trust in your relationship with someone and things didn’t work out.

All the emotions this called up in you probably came on in a flash—as did your response to them. And then you most likely thought something along the lines of…

“This just doesn’t feel right.”

Now think about someone you wanted to have a romantic relationship with but for whatever reason you knew it wouldn’t work.

You knew it wasn’t going to happen… you knew all the valid reasons why… but that didn’t stop you from daydreaming about falling in love. Here’s why:

When we’re children, we learn what love is from our parents or caregivers, and this stays with us for the rest of our lives.

That’s how we start out: a baby who soaks up all the emotional and behavioral characteristics of its mother. And then we feel instinctively pulled to those qualities—however they show up—later in our adult lives.

(Psychology calls this “mother-infant observational research.” You can find tons of information about it.)

When you were a baby, your Mom was the first person you ever met. This means that the way she treated you got into you very early, at the deepest, most foundational level… and it became the blueprint for what you think love is.

It’s how you learned what you deserve. What to do to please. What to do to be loved.

Therefore, many psychologists say your bond with this mother “figure” is also responsible for your oldest emotions… including any hurt or problems that still linger, or any needs you try to get met through your decisions and relationships today. Childhood depression is at the heart of many adult behaviors and pain.

You depended on Mom for your survival, so you took in what you needed to do to keep her love, approval, and attention. The same went for Dad, or any major caregiver.

Unfortunately, this can lead to childhood trauma that causes depression later as an adult.

Maybe Mom was violent, so now you feel like no one could love you. Perhaps Dad criticized you, so now you have problems trusting or asserting yourself. Or it could be both your parents were so full of anxiety that you absorbed the message: “If you aren’t extremely careful and perfect in everything you do, it’ll get even worse.”

But if you accept any childhood experience like this as a reality, then you can move forward with a powerful new understanding about yourself, life, and relationships.

Maybe you’ll see more clearly how your childhood experiences influence your relationships… your choices and actions… and how you keep finding yourself in the same situations from the past in an unconscious attempt to resolve them.

Whichever way your childhood depression shows up in your adult life, I’ll tell you one thing: it’s unfortunate for a person to see this stuff damaging everyday life, including relationships, thoughts and actions.

But, once you do, here’s the great news about it…

You Can Use This Knowledge To Change Your Life

I can’t emphasize one particular thing enough because it’s definitely one of the most profound insights I’ve come across when it comes to depression treatment…

As you cope with depression, it’s essential to heal any wound from your family past so you can stop it from replaying in your mind and stop it from damaging your life. That’s why, to get you help with the process, I recommend pursuing depression counseling.

NOTE: I’m not suggesting that you blame others as a way to avoid making your own positive changes.

But with that said, I think a big part of depression treatment for someone who had depression as a child is remembering that painful memories and triggers are the results of trying to cope with a terrible childhood situation.

If you learn to see how your challenges might come from ways you learned to cope that made sense in a dysfunctional childhood… but which may need to be reworked in adulthood… you might accept yourself more and find new ways to cope that make sense in your life today.

When we haven’t been protected by our caregivers, we might not be able to see how to protect ourselves. Or love ourselves. Or find what makes us happy. We might have to teach ourselves how to do these things.

It’s common to treat ourselves as we’ve been taught, so it’s understandable if the real meaning of love may elude us.

Here’s a quick exercise: maybe you can take a few minutes and reflect about your interactions with your family… write down the painful memories on paper… and burn them. It could bring release and healing.

It’s Time To Take Care Of You!

Even if you had a rough childhood, you still have a chance to move forward. It can be the way you start to heal, but you have a choice to make. You can keep struggling with childhood wounds… or you can break the cycle of depression.

If you’d like to get even deeper into the change process… including simple, step-by-step methods for breaking free of the past to manage your depression in the present… please contact me for a free 15-minute consultation.

I know it will help you take your first step forward… and, best of all, help you overcome the past and move on.

CONTACT ME

Find out more about Depression Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

And if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

The Secret Reason Behind Your Depression

Learn The Secret Reason Most People Are Depressed And What You Can Do About It

I’ve known a lot of people who are struggling with depression. And one of the things I’ve noticed is that almost everyone who’s depressed has a reason—a logical story why life isn’t working out.

The Secret Reason Why…

I’ve come to see that most people who are depressed carry around a “Secret Reason” for why they’re broken and struggling… a Secret Reason for depression.

For some it’s their appearance, for some it’s their age, for some it’s their lost opportunities… and for others, it’s a reason deep inside themselves… maybe it’s the childhood they had, or where they live, or who’s in their life.

Usually, this reason is part of a larger story they’d almost never share with anyone else because it comes from such a vulnerable, painful place inside.

What’s your Secret Reason for why you’re coping with depression?

Your Reason Isn’t As “Secret” As It May Feel

Here’s the best part about it… no matter how “private” or “personal” your Secret Reason is, you can find help for it in depression treatment.

Depression counseling can offer you the chance to finally heal from your Secret Reason.

Because guess what?

I guarantee you that there are many people in this world who have survived and managed your very same painful situation in depression therapy and moved forward with life.

I think that the “Secret Reason” is our way as human beings of making it easier to cope with reality…

The Reason For Depression Is Inside Ourselves… It’s The Way We Think And Behave.

The problem with a Secret Reason isn’t the reason itself… it’s the fact that most people don’t know how to recover from and manage their Secret Reason.

Even worse, Secret Reasons can wire themselves into our minds so deeply that we don’t realize how they’re affecting everything.

If you believe everyone makes you feel worthless, then you probably won’t even try to question it. You might just assume they’re right. This leads to more suffering, like feeling lonely and sad or being scared to talk to people.

If you’re someone who’s convinced there’s some big reason that’s preventing the possibility of it ever getting better, it begins to influence everything in your life.

So how do you heal?

I’d say this is at least a two-step process:

1. You need to find your “Secret Reason,” and you need to take it apart, study it and understand all its ins and outs with a depression therapist like me. This will provide you with an objective, professional view on what’s troubling you so you’re not alone in this any longer.

2. You need to learn about depression and what you personally need from life.

It really amazes me that you can walk into any high school or college and find a hundred classes on everything from computers to mathematical formulas… but zero books on what to do if you might be falling apart.

Stunning. But it’s true.

It’s Time To Cope In A Healthy Way

One of the reasons I put so much time and effort into learning how to be a depression therapist is because I really want to help those who are hurting from this kind of pain in life.

If you want help from a compassionate depression therapist, then I recommend you try depression treatment with me. If we work together, then we can use dozens of different therapeutic concepts, strategies, and step-by-step techniques for treating and managing depression.

I’m here to help you recover and move forward. If you’re in pain and you want some extra support, please contact me for a free 15-minute consultation and we can discuss how to work together.

CONTACT ME

 Find out more about Depression Treatment.

About The Author

John Younes, JD, MA, LPCC, NCC is a trained counselor who owns a private practice in Denver, CO. In general, he specializes in depression treatment using existential and cognitive therapy practices.

And if you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number… so for Denver, Colorado, call 1-844-493-8255 or text TALK to 38255. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.